Ghost Stories Sentence Starters

"So I was nailing this midget when my mom walked in-"

"Not Grand Theft Auto! What would Hilary Clinton say?"

"I thought meth was only this bad in Oregon."

"You just KNOW she's covering her lust for me with cruelty and violence."

"It might be painful-like watching Two and a Half Men-but you'll get used to it after awhile."

"You smoked it all, didn't you?!"

"So, what do you wanna talk about? It's not that rash again, is it?"

"Please save me Lord, for I am your favorite among these heathens."

"Sure!...jackass."

"Now, open your books and turn your page to whatever."

"Verizon, like Jesus, never stops working for you!"

"Years ago, people went into that tunnel and never came out, kinda like your sister."

"You are shockingly hateful."

"What movie are we ripping off again?"

"TIME TO GO GREAT SANTINI ON HIS ASS!"

"Why are old people always watching the weather channel?"

"Thundercats, HO!"

"RUN! She's a ghost AND a bitch!"

"Aw, that's so sweet! In a Emily Rose, you-scare-the-hell-outta-me kinda way!"

"Time to go home, load up that bong and watch Pokemon!"

"Monsters only get evil people like Republicans, and we're not old enough to vote!"

"Principals always look like lesbians."

"Aren't any of you bastards gonna help me?!"

"What the fizzity uck was that?!"

"Butch it up and get the torches."

"Let's fizzity uckin' find out!"

"Hey, I know! Why don't we meet at the scary isolated payphone on the bad side of town?"

"You're an ass! Let us out, you ass!"

"Hello, I can read! Not well, but I can read."